Moochers and Calculators



Ever have one of those moments when you say one thing, but really mean something completely different? Chief had the bright idea to put all these thoughts in blog form and have a big carnival! After you read what I meant said, go visit Chief to read some more funny stuff!

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The other day I had to run to the grocery store to pick up a few things for dinner. As usual, I was running behind. I had to get in and get out so I could get a good parking spot to get GG from school. It's too cold to try and walk a bazillion miles!

So Little Dude and I run in, grab what we need and get in line. Sweet, thought I. We picked a short line! Of course we were behind this lady whose friend had run back to get her a precious case of Diet Crap Coke. Fine. Whatever. We all forget things sometimes. Then she starts checking that everything rang up right on the screen. With our store, it shows the regular price and then what you actually paid is underneath. Apparently she did not see this and argued with the cashier over every little item.

What I did... checked my phone for the time and shook my head. There were no shorter lines so I wasn't even gonna look.

What I meant to say... Look lady. I have somewhere to be. And in case you didn't notice, there's a line forming behind me. And not one of those people look too pleased with you right about now. If you're worried about going over budget when you shop, than what you need to do is bring a darn calculator with you and add as you go. You brought a friend - she can help with the math in case you can't figure it out!

The other day my neighbor knocks on my door. After I make sure it wasn't Little Dude, cuz he likes to trick us by knocking, I open the door. Her cell phone bill was due and she asked if I could give her a lift to the store the next morning.

And, yes, this is the neighbor who needed a ride to her sister's and also asked me to pay a utility bill for her using my bank card and she would give me cash.
Anyway, what I said... I had to go do something at my mom's the next day. I didn't know what time and I wouldn't talk to my mom til later in the day. All of that was true by the way. She said if she saw our car in the driveway the next morning she would come over. Whatever. I guess it wouldn't kill my to get out of my pajamas before noon. It's only 1 time, right?
What I meant to say... I refer to our car as "Mom's Taxi".



That means the only people privileged enough to get chauffeured around are the ones who live in Mom's kingdom. No where in there does it say "Neighborhood Taxi"! I see you walking all over the neighborhood so don't even try to tell my that it's too far to walk from the bus stop to the store. It's a 1/2 mile from your house to the grocery store, which I see you walk all the time! You won't have to walk that far. Suck it up and take a bus!


Last night I was getting in the car when I saw my neighbor taking her trash out. Yes, same neighbor. Being all neighborly and junk, I waved. She looked directly at me and walked back in her house. What I meant to do... Give her a wave. Minus 4 fingers!


Until next time...

19 comments:

Heather @ Two Little Monkeys said...

Oh I hate when people argue with the cashier over the price of stuff.

Chief said...

I always pick the line with the nuttybutter who fights over 2 cents!

and you know how I feel about the middle finger salute!

Steven Anthony said...

I hate grocery store lines, seems like I always pick the wrong one:(

Epiphius said...

I watch the prices too, but I take it over to customer service so I'm not the pain in the butt she was!

~Kaydee~ said...

I think every neighborhood has a mooch.

Kmama said...

Your neighbor sounds like a total nut job!!

I hate the self-checkout. I think it needs a sign that says "Less than 12 Items and No Morons".

blueviolet said...

She sounds like she's going to keep trying to take advantage of you. I don't like it!

The Princess of Sarcasm said...

Oh right, because you should pay for your car, gas, insurance, and taxes so that you can be convenient to HER and do what SHE needs! My college roommate got a dui and I had to drive her back and forth to campus. It was really inconvenient, but she was a really good friend, so I did it. But I got VERY annoyed when she'd get all pissy that it took me a while to get to her sometimes. It was hard to just drop everything and rush right out and get her all the time. If you don't like the fact that I have stuff to do too, then find someone else willing to haul your a$$ around. (Dang...I'm getting all worked up again. lol)

Shell said...

That neighbor would annoy me so much.

Sunday said...

Freaking neighbors...why can't they ever been friendly and civilized?

Queenie Jeannie said...

I think God just went way overboard on making stoopid people!!

SupahMommy said...

wave without 4 fingers..

lmaooo

xoxo
supah

Melissa said...

What the what? Diet crap? Sacrelidge! :) I think I spelled that wrong.

You are a nice neighbor. She's lucky she doesn't get her house egged.

Mae Rae said...

Whacko deserved the salute, you should have given it to her.

Amber said...

your neighbor lady is a total crazy!

Melissa said...

If it makes you feel any better, I got behind a dumb a** who wrote a check for each individual item...I nearly killed both her and the cashier for allowing it.

Megan said...

It never fails that i get in the line behind the person that is paying for $50 worth of stuff with pennies. I could literally lay down in the floor and pitch a temper tantrum that would rival a two yr olds.

Happy Humpday!

Brittney said...

I think they should have a special lane for people that have to debate every flippin item!

Tater Tot Mom said...

We used to have a neighbor like this and I'm so glad that she finally moved out because it was getting to be too much drama!