Living in Denial

I've been doing some thinking this week. I've come to realize that I am the best mommy out there. I have the perfect kids and everything that surrounds us is perfect. Life is just grand!

Let me explain why I am the perfect mom...

~I give my kids snacks. The healthy ones, like Oreo Cakesters. Hey, they're the 100 calorie ones. That has to count for something, right?!

~I am very good at predicting the weather. I have mastered this skill so I can plan my day accordingly. For example, today it was supposed to rain. I had no desire to be stuck at the pool with my midgets while it rained. And besides that, I was really tired from swimming the past few days and my skin is starting to dry out from the chlorine. Every parent tells their kid little white lies, right?!

~I do laundry more than I care to admit. I love when my kids look all spiffy in their clean clothes. But washing the clothes is about as far as I get. If you want to wear your clean underwear, go downstairs and get them please.

~I used to have a job where the pay was in the paper form. I knew exactly how to balance work and kids. What you do is give your kids Tylenol in the morning before you leave. Hopefully you can get at least a half day of work in before their fever returns and you have to pick them up and go home.

~Cartoons can be very educational. Although that does depend on which child has control of the remote at the moment. But whatever they decide to watch, I'm sure has some educational value in it. And it gives me some peace and quiet. See! It's a win win situation!

~Taking my oldest to see her then BFF, Elmo was one of the best things I have ever done. I bought floor seats, 2 rows from the stage. I was being the best mom ever! It didn't matter that she wasn't feeling up to par. I just referred back to the day care rule. A little Tylenol accompanied by a few favorite snacks and all was good. Except she was a cranky mess through the whole thing. Don't worry, karma came back to bite me for that one. She doesn't remember a thing about her visit to Elmo's World!

You didn't think I was serious about thinking that I am the perfect mom, did you? In reality, I think I've been in denial all week. I am finally standing up tall and admitting that I am NOT mommy of the year!

Not mom of the year
hosted by
the Mommyologist
Life Without Pink

Until next time....


Unknown said...

lmbo I so hear ya.. I have learned that benadryl can be the best sleeping medicine when used properly but it can also backfire on ya lol

Oka said...

I didn't see anything wrong with your description of being a Mom.

*bet that scares you about my mothering*

Kristin said...

Hey, I'm a firm believe in doing whatever works...LOL.

Anonymous said...

you had me at perfect;)

Unknown said...

Oh, man! I would be beside myself if I'd paid all that money for Elmo tickets and my kiddo didn't remember! Some days you just can't win :(

Life Without Pink said...

Oh ELMO I remember taking my oldest son to see the show. I feel bad but I haven't taken my second in fear he wouldn't sit through and it would just be too much work. So good for you - at least you tried!

Thanks for entering!

Shell said...

LOL And yet, your kids are loved and taken care of- that's what counts!

I've loved reading the Not Mom of the Year posts- b/c it shows the "real" side of mothering.

The Mommyologist said...

I've found that I'm quite good at predicting the weather these days as well! I even use the "it's too hot to swim" excuse, which makes no sense, but it works for me!

Sorry I am so late on reading your post...I was traveling all weekend!

Mungee's Ma said...

It's always too hot to do anything around here. I think Mungee would even agree and she's only 11 months old!

Unknown said...

Whew this post goes right up there with my 'things I've learned' posts that another friend of mine writes about her life with two kids, military spouse, and several pets in the house. Good stuff good stuff mama!!!! Keep on truckin and keeping us entertained!!! Oh and Oreo cakesters ROCK!!!!